[Thoughts from  ~burning woman~  ]

Let me begin thus: I find myself living in a totally dysfunctional world of semi intelligent creatures caught up in a paranoid fear of death using superstition to justify their mindless, senseless rituals. So petrified of death are they that they’ll condemn each other to a living hell rather than stop, just for a few moments, to regain some semblance of sanity. But as I’ve discovered, that’s not how the program of the hive mind functions.

In juxtaposition to this global spiritual and mental madness, I find myself contemplating my own death or the possibility of it, not as an escape from the madness – I’ve left those thoughts behind long ago – but as a closing in inevitability. I’m in my mid seventies and haven’t forgotten that my original idea of a long life saw it end at fifty. Every year since that time has been a bonus.

Most of us may not choose the time of our death but we can all choose what kind of person we have made ourselves into when we arrive at that moment. Who do I want to be when I die? Not how do I want to be seen or remembered, but who am I going to be?

If memory serves, and I have died many times so I should know, arriving at one’s death is a pretty definitive moment. It’s like punching out at the end of the day: day is done and I cannot go back over it and change anything. I can look back but I cannot act back. If I spoke out of turn or acted wrongly, the cat is out of the bag.

That’s how life is. We are given choices all the time and many of those are difficult. Where corruption, dishonesty and greed is the order of the day it seems so much “smarter” to play ball but where does that leave society? More importantly, where does that leave me when I look back at my personal track record? What’s on my resume?

Let’s stir that pot a bit.

Many decades ago I realized that people were not abandoning their religions because they were evolving, or simply allowing their intelligence to win over their superstitious beliefs. They were choosing to serve a different god who declared that overt greed, hedonism and selfishness were the new virtues. That god’s name was Capitalism, aided and abetted by Science.

Giving any kind of personal account to a long-time invisible deity was no longer in the cards. It was worth the risk to turn one’s back on the God of religion to savour the pleasures of the moment offered by the new Church of Consumerism. The switch from an instituted religion to agnosticism or atheism was never a bid for spiritual or mental freedom but for longer coffee breaks and a paid lunch hour.

And of course I was right – the curse of being observant. Faith equipped with a new superstition has returned with a vengeance. It took a bit for the programming to adjust; for the conditioning AI’s to create new algorithms, but here we are in the midst of a new religion worshiping a relatively new god: technology. Technology does not promise eternal life but the good life here and now available through credit, legal drugs and medical procedures all meant to make “the good life” last beyond the point of having any relevance or meaning. Despite all evidence to the contrary, the new faith has guaranteed the new belief’s global success. 

Like all previous gods technology demands absolute obedience and mindless worship. That’s what faith is, but it needs testing. Technology’s high priesthood, the billionaire technophiles, have invented certain rituals by which modern true believers are tested and instantly known. First they reinvented the Devil and give that distinguished gentleman a new name. Beelzebub became the dread virus Covid 19, the deadliest Devil ever invented whose immanence is endlessly bolstered by the high priesthood’s government and corporate agents and their talking heads.

His enemies will be the obedient masses who wear the mandated garments denoting purity of body and soon to be marked for life with the divine vaccine which the lesser priests (the bureaucracies) will administer. Those who refuse to wear the mark will be called demon worshipers. They will be spied upon, hounded, cast out, rounded up and imprisoned, denied access to schools, public institutions and other services – whatever the high priesthood chooses as methods of punishment for non-compliance.

It was but a matter of time before superstition reasserted itself in the Earthian hive mind. When it comes to society’s performance, the powers that be need not strain themselves looking for new controlling methods. They just need to tweak the programming to match the currency of the times. Fear and superstition once more rule the world. Millennia and nothing has moved forward among the crowded homo sapiens crowds. Not a single thing. 

So I look at that and think, well, why should I acquiesce to this? How can I not dissent? And if dissenting is going to make my own life hell, why not concentrate on “dying well” if non-dissent is blasphemy against my nature? I never had much use for superstition and a collective belief in the new Devil invented to enrich the technophiles is not going to sway me in that direction! I have seen the enemy and it wasn’t me. It was the Powers and their sycophantic, frantic servants, disciples, followers, and the masses of believers.

My body may yet surprise me and last a few years. That means I may have to endure the results of madcap, often deadly rituals performed by a hive mind gone off the deep end but I resolve to continue to develop this “me” I have learned to trust against all the offering of man’s society. When I finally die, I will not do so within a fear filled, drug crazed mind enslaved to mindless belief and ritual. I will not be leaving a life with nothing to show for itself but the end of a path of blind obedience, dully hoping that somehow my acquiescence bought me a few extra days or months of the promised “consumer bliss.” When I die it will be with the dignity of dissent against a murderous, insane, sociopathic system. It will be in the knowledge that in my mind I always, always, said “NO!”


“Roots” (from an old cottonwood along the Hope river, Chilliwack – August 28, 2020)

2 thoughts on “Who would you like to be when you die?

  1. franklparker

    I was with you until you brought in the Covid 19 conspiracy theory – again!. And, to be fair, I disagree with your condemnation of science and technology. It’s their misuse that is the problem. And you are absolutely correct in pointing to capitalism as the culprit. Science and technology have been, and continue to be, used for much that is good in the world. The question we all have to ask is: do we please ourselves or do we please someone else? And I’m not suggesting by that that we should be subserviant to another, controlled or dominated by him/her/them. I am saying that we need to ensure the well being of others as well as of ourselves. That is not too difficult a concept to grasp, although you are correct to point out that most of us have lost sight of it and chosen, instead, to become subserviant to some group or belief system that promises far more than can be delivered without hurting others.


    1. Sha'Tara Post author

      Hi Frank, thanks for commenting. Point #1, I never apologize for stating how I see a situation. I didn’t just wake up one morning and decide to be anti-Covid 19 or anti-vaxx for that matter. It’s easy to demonize individuals who take exception to being used as cannon fodder, guinea pigs or as generic slaves. It’s easy because we live in a global conspiracy all the time. Any intelligent assessment of the workings of finance, governments and religions will reveal that. Sadly, the herd would rather live in blind denial. Once denial is the reality, those who remain aware become the devil’s advocates, the conspiracy theorists. It’s easy to see how Covid 19 is purely a scamdemic. Read the real numbers and what serious independent medical experts have been saying and continue to say about it until one by one they are being shut down by major social media and blocked/ignored my mainstream media. Follow the money, Frank. Watch Bill Gates. Watch Google. Watch “Pig” Pharma. Watch the shenanigans. All this destruction of national economies – done in the name of concern for the health of the people? You kidding me? These Mickey Mouse bureaucrats are the same ilk that denies proper social medical care to those who are the most in need of it. I could go on but unless one is totally blind, everybody knows this.
      As for science, there are two kinds of science. There is “natural” science, where well meaning individuals do serious research and make sometimes valuable discoveries which become part of civilization’s progress. Then there is Science. Perhaps a better term would be science fiction. This is the propaganda science. This is the one that makes certain people and organizations rich and powerful to lord it over the Earthian herd. This is the Science promoting the fear of, and the inane response to, the totally imaginary Covid 19 “god” of the age. When I talk against science I’m talking about the unscientific Science of power, money and adulation, the Science of faith, not the science of proven facts.
      Greed is an endemic condition amongst Earthians and capitalism has blossomed from that manure pile. Capitalism is the worship of hedonistic selfishness and it is destroying man’s civilization. Again, simple observation. It is my opinion that the level of corruption everywhere is beyond any fix. Covid 19 was invented as a global pandemic to hide the fact that the global banking system had literally run aground. Now the destruction wrought by greed can conveniently be blamed on an invisible and non-existent virus. Clever that. And while this is happening, the greedy who stood to lose much of their stockpiles of illegally gathered loot continue to pile up more. Double clever that, eh Watson?

      Liked by 1 person


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